Looking after yourself when you support someone with a lung condition

Looking after yourself when you’re a carer is important.  

Caring for someone can feel positive and rewarding. It can also feel exhausting and overwhelming. It may sometimes be difficult to balance caring for someone with other things happening in your life.

Some people tell us they feel guilty or selfish when they’re thinking about themselves instead of the person they’re caring for. Others tell us that they also have their own health conditions to manage. All your feelings are valid.

It’s okay to take time for yourself and to ask for support. It can help you to avoid getting ‘carer burnout’ over time, which is where you feel physically, emotionally and mentally exhausted.

Research shows that getting support and looking after yourself as a carer is not only important for your own wellbeing but also improves the care you can give someone.  

We know it can be hard to take a break or think about yourself when you’re busy caring for someone else. Try to find a bit of time for self-care, for example by making looking after yourself part of your daily routine.

Find out how to keep yourself healthy and well when you’re a carer.

Most GP surgeries keep a record of who is a carer. This is because they know that keeping you well means you can continue to keep the person you care for well too.

It’s important to tell your GP surgery you’re a carer so you can: 

• get extra support to stay healthy and well
• be invited to get an annual flu vaccine
• have more flexible appointment times if possible
• get advice and support, for example about how to take a break and any financial support you can get for this.

Find out more about talking to your GP and proving your caring role from Carers UK.

Find out more about work and benefits as a carer [link TBA].

We know that taking a break can be hard when you have someone else relying on you.

But it’s important for you, and the person you care for, to try and take some time out for yourself. If you’re more rested, then you have more to give to the person you’re caring for. 

Here are some ideas on how you can get an important break from caring:

Plan small breaks into your day

Taking time to yourself doesn’t mean you need to take a whole day off or spend money. Even taking half an hour to yourself can help you feel more rested. 

Watch the videos about taking a break from Carers UK. 

Respite care 

Respite care is when you take a break from caring and someone else looks after the person you care for.

There are lots of different options for respite care. It could mean a volunteer sits with the person you look after for a few hours or takes them out to an activity group or day centre.

You may also be able to get extra help with caring from charities or organisations, or your local council. The help you’ll get depends on your local area.

Find out more about carers’ breaks and respite care from the NHS, including the different types of respite care and how to arrange it.

If you have friends or family, ask for help if you need longer time out

If you’re someone’s main carer, it’s a good idea to have support from family and friends if you can so that you can make time for yourself and your own needs. 

If you can, building up a support network can make a big difference. Think about the kind of help you might need from your family, friends and neighbours, and speak to them about helping with specific tasks.

Involve the person you care for in thinking about who can help.

Make sure you have someone ready to help if you’re ever unwell too and can’t care for your loved one. 

Carers UK has information about getting support from family and friends.

It’s important that you stay healthy and well for yourself, but also so you can continue to look after the person you care for well. 

Here are a few tips on how to make looking after yourself part of your day.

Do a bit of exercise and activity every day

You may feel like you’re doing all the activity you need in your caring role. But if you can fit some exercise and activity into your day that’s just for you, it may help with your mental and physical health. If your caring responsibilities include physical demands like lifting someone, it’s especially important to look after your body to keep you safe and well.

You could even do some activity and exercise with the person you’re caring for, if that’s possible. 

• Try our Keep Active programme, designed for people with lung conditions – it includes exercises you can do at home. 
• Try these 10 minute at-home exercises from the NHS if you’re short on time.
• Carers UK has lots of information about keeping active.

Eat healthy food and snacks

When you’re short of time, it can be tempting to grab the nearest or quickest thing to eat. Sometimes this might include unhealthy foods with lots of sugar or salt. 

Eating healthy fresh foods can make a real difference to your energy levels. You could also try batch cooking and freezing meals to save you time.

Find out more about eating well from Carers UK. 

Look after your mental health and wellbeing 

When you look after someone, you might adapt and change your lifestyle to make time for caring. This may happen over time, and it can be hard to notice the change when it’s gradual. 

It’s also hard to watch someone you care about struggle with shortness of breath [link TBA to caring for someone with breathlessness] or other symptoms. 

If you’re struggling with your mental wellbeing, you’re not alone – more than 1 in 4 carers struggle with their mental health.

You may feel anxious, stressed or have symptoms of depression. Sometimes, you may feel difficult emotions like resentment or guilt too.

To look after your mental wellbeing:

• Meet with friends as regularly as you can – staying in touch and having a social life will help your mental health. If it’s difficult for you to get out, you could try online groups or phone calls to connect with people. 
• The mental health charity Mind has information on supporting yourself when you’re a carer.
• Carers UK has advice about coping with guilt, resentment and other difficult emotions.
• Find your local carers’ support group, for help and advice where you live. 
• We have lots of in-person and online support groups for people with lung conditions and anyone supporting someone with a lung condition. 
• Share your experiences and connect with other carers via our HealthUnlocked forum, or another forum.
• Read stories from other carers on Carers UK or Carers Trust.
• Speak to a healthcare professional like your GP about getting more support, if you need it. 

• Carers UK – provide help and advice for carers, such how to look after your wellbeing, access benefits, carer’s assessments, and respite care.
• Breaks and respite care – the NHS has more information on getting help with carer’s breaks and respite care.
• Carers Trust – provides support and advice for carers, including those under 18, a forum and information about local support centres.
• Age UK – advice for older carers and a telephone befriending service.
• The Children’s Society – support for young carers and their families.
• NHS social care and support guide – information on financial support, equipment and social services help.
• Local Mind  – have mental health services including drop-in centres and training, counselling and befriending.